general nhokitov (198)

For sale to highest bidder: 15 kg of enriched weapons grade uranium. Presented in attractive lead lined titanium carry-on attaché case, and complete with certificates of authenticity from the International Atomic Energy Authority.

Produced at the Chernobyl nuclear facility, carried aboard the Kursk nuclear submarine and formerly a good luck mascot for Leicester City Football Club, this enriched uranium would provide an ideal, er, doorstop maybe. Or a big paperweight perhaps for someone very important. Anyway, no suspicious or dangerous connotations with this sale. No siree. All ship-shape and above board.

Bids will not be accepted from Iraq, Iran or North Korea (the bastards still haven’t paid for the last lot and we’re not falling for it again)

Your bid: